How did I found glee in that unusual sky, when they found gloom and doom on that same celestial dome.



“When you are passionate about what you are doing, an hour feels like 5 minutes while 5 minutes feels like an hour if you’re not”. these are words from Sir Ken Robinson, a british educator who believes that our current education system should be revolutionized in favor of not killing creativity specially during childhood school age.

His words resonate my long held thoughts about this matter. For one,  I’ve been brought by a family who believes in professional success – that there is no other way to do this but to study and practice rigidly, not allowing oneself to fully experience the beauty of childhood thus the beauty of life; and competition – to be always ahead of the game. Since I was always a well disciplined, all obeying child, I followed suit to their advices suppressing the feeling of unhappiness from inadequacy that my small voice is whispering to me.

And for the reaping from the past choices that was made, coupled by the way school had misguided or unguided me, I am at lost. Now, I know a person who is specially dear to me. This guy has been tremendously agonized by the same predicaments that I am in but to add more, he also suffers the brunt of deviance, for he refused to practice all he had studied  knowing he wont find happiness. Whose more of a loser between the two? Perhaps the one who followed the dictates of the society, the one who was unable to follow the voice.

How did I managed to work all these years enduring and not enjoying?

It’s a wish as well as an ongoing feat to find that element. To look for that passion that will resonate my whole being that when I do tasks, hours, days,months-are not enough because i am enjoying what i am doing. I cannot imagine life if I am not doing what I am doing.

Double Rainbow

Thinking of a light, ordinary afternoon ahead after a long day sleep, we decided to have some coffee and cigarettes outside to linger the drizzle, when something out of the ordinary happened. I was not able to believe my eyes when I saw a spectrum of colors playing in the sky above me. Distant lights transforming into a magically full-arched rainbow, having full contrast with a dark sky behind it: this gave a somewhat magical gloom to that afternoon.

Watching that spectacular scene, out of somewhere came an uneasiness deep inside me making me grasp for air, and for some moment later, I realized the must be reason behind it- -another rainbow had been forming. A double, full-arched rainbow was there before my eyes. I felt so lucky to be in that vantage point on the right moment of that afternoon. I felt everything fell in place; I am on the right place, the droplets after the drizzle are on a 42 degrees opposite the smiling sun, and I’m with the right person to savor that enchanting scene.



I was on my other persona that day. A free spirited hippie being awakened by a boisterous cascade of the  waterfalls  that seems to be a melodic hush while I was asleep, with my back against my rock hard tent bed. On day break, the rays of sunlight sent shivers to my body, untangling each tensed and twisted muscle, refreshing my soul. What a delightful way to start a day!

Hiking up ahead to grab a cup of coffee from a nearby store owned by a T’boli local in lake Sebu, I was struck by a huge goose. I sat on one of those ratan chairs charmed and hypnotized by his presence. I could have mistaken the creature as a sort of angel with those heavenly white feather  if not only for the offset orange large beak and feet that makes me think of martians and aliens. He came closer to me; slow paced, taking his time to shift weight from his left foot to right foot and vice versa. Still stunned, I seem to concentrate on his monstrous, orange, shell- hard beak that can break anything that he set gaze on. And if not for a friend who gave a yell after seeing me and mr. goose,  I did not realised that I am the one he is setting his gaze on- ready to pinch me into pieces.

Atheism 2.0

I stumbled upon a talk in TED by Alain de Botton, a writer / essayist ,whose usual  musings revolve around life, travel, love, culture, religion and mostly anything that suits my interest.

In the near 20 minutes talk, he dug deeper into atheism calling it Atheism 2.0. Starting with the basic  premise of atheism that there is no god or deities, that believing in them is akin to believing fairies and is ridiculous, he then elaborated a new way on being an atheist.

I myself, is a self confessed atheist, though I do not usually open the subject in a fine day  to my overly religious mother, for it would just take out her liveliness knowing that she failed raising a daughter in accordance to the doctrines of her church.

I don’t despise my mother’s religion, it had helped a many during tough times and if these structure can make them stay sane and enable them to do good in the society, then theres not a lot i can complain of aside from the fact that the doctrine itself is a falsehood for me and I cant bear to live my life following it. I had learned to overcome depression and go on through emotional instability without using religion so I believe that I don’t need one to dictate how i should deal with my humanly unstable emotions, which I believe is one great purpose of religion at least to the believers.

Don’t get me wrong but I really look forward to christmases; the intoxicating smell of puto bongbong and bibingka (native cakes in philippines) during mass at dawn before christmas, eating Noche Buena with families and friends ,to the sweet melodious charm of children singing christmas carols.I even adore Islam’s guttural music in reciting the Quran or the Hindus mystic paintings and stone carvings. All give me a sense of pleasure towards life.

Partly, these  are what Alain is trying to impart that theres nothing wrong from mixing and matching. Surely, there is a lot of wonderful things we can learn and get from the major religion in the world, starting from its structure to its art; and it is possible that we can selectively apply it to our life but minus the doctrine.

TED Blog

What aspects of religion should atheists (respectfully) adopt? Alain de Botton suggests a “religion for atheists” — call it Atheism 2.0 — that incorporates religious forms and traditions to satisfy our human need for connection, ritual and transcendence. (Recorded at TEDGlobal 2011, July 2011, in Edinburgh, Scotland. Duration: 19:20.)

Watch Alain de Botton’s talk on TED.com, where you can download it, rate it, comment on it and find other talks and performances from our archive of 1,000+ TEDTalks.

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Ramblings : On non-attachment

“I was surprised, as always,at how easy the act of leaving was, and how good it felt. The world is suddenly rich with  possibility”. – Jack Kerouac, On the Road

A recent event made me realize on how the world can be so frustrating. Putting so much faith on someone, something or anything that is bound to change, failing your expectations can be so depressing. To lessen frustrations and to be able to enjoy each morsel life has to offer, one must appreciate and apply non-attachment.

True to say, nothing is constant except change. And so everything, everybody changes, and it is not a thing to shudder. Change should be celebrated for it is a wonderful thing, what a lame world this would be if  art does not evolve, nothing new in music or people stay the same.

The idea of non attachment doesn’t mean to deprive oneself from the beautiful feelings associated with  love, hope, care which are essential to one’s happiness.It means to realize that everything changes and one ought to celebrate each of these moments without hesitation, savoring all emotions that accompanies, knowing that it’s impossible to experience it again.